The Secret to discipline….
Most men are emotionally dysregulated, telling themselves they need more discipline.
I get it. You've seen the online coaches and athletes posing in pictures with their shirts off, just telling you to be disciplined.
So, you tell yourself, "I need more discipline" because they inspire you, and you want to be more like them.
But what does discipline mean to you? Think about that for a moment.
You might say it’s doing something hard at a particular point when you don’t feel like doing it, but it’ll pay off later.
But how?
Most men just spin their wheels, judging themselves for a lack of discipline. They act like it’s all about just trying harder and punishing themselves to change, rather than focusing on the skills they need to develop to show up as the person they want to be.
It can be beneficial, obviously, to try harder, but trying harder with poor strategy still keeps you stuck, repeating the same cycles.
I'm guessing this resonates with many of you. I see it all the time.
If you're emotionally dysregulated, you'll be:
Procrastinating a lot
Drinking too much
Losing control of food and using it to cope with stress
Maybe even taking drugs
Skipping the gym when not feeling motivated
At Resilience 90, we understand this. We use somatic practices and other strategies to help regulate emotions and work on emotional alignment to regain control over your health and fitness.
Emotional regulation refers to the ability to manage and respond to emotional experiences in a healthy and balanced way, encompassing awareness, acceptance, and control over your emotions.
Most men think they can go it alone. They bottle it all up and try to do it as lone wolves. But that’s not the path to resilience. Suppressing and avoiding your problems and emotions, trying to handle it all on your own, is why so many men stay stuck.
When you're able to lean on others during your struggles—letting them support you rather than hiding and burning yourself out—that's when you become more resilient.
Jack's Story
Before working with me, Jack was stuck in a cycle of binge eating and emotional suppression. He tried to manage everything on his own, believing that discipline alone would be the answer. After learning somatic practices and exploring what true alignment looks like in his life, Jack was able to regulate his emotions, stop using food as a coping mechanism, and feel more in control than ever. He's now living with more confidence and is on track to achieve his long-term goals.
Resilience is the ability to adapt well in the face of adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats, or significant sources of stress, and to bounce back from difficult experiences.
Reflection Questions:
What does discipline mean to you personally? How do you practice it in your daily life?
Do you find yourself trying to "go it alone" or bottle up your emotions? How is that working for you?
In what areas of your life are you emotionally dysregulated? What steps can you take to regain control in those areas?
How can leaning on others for support during difficult times help you become more resilient?
Have you been repeating the same cycles of trying harder without seeing results? What different strategy could you try?